You've to accept my worst in order to deserve my best.
I had a great talk w my pri sch childhood friends today. It feels rlly great to put down everything and have heart to heart talks! :)
Somehow, i realised the true meaning of love. In my relationships, i tend to be really sensitive, but serious. I rmbr when i first started having a crush on my 1st ex, i was rlly excited everyday i see him. Whenever we go outing, i'll have a sleepless night the night before. I was like, omg, we can be together, what can i do to make him notice me. I really was madly in love w him. Nomatter what he's my first love. We get together from friends to lovers. That's the most sweetest part. We got to know each other flaws and attitude, character etc..The sweetest feeling coming from this relationship lasted no longer than 1yearhalf. I was rlly upset due to the breakup. But everything was worthwhile.
However, now i was rlly heartbroken due to my second failed relationship. I was crying to myself everyday, why did he left me? Why? I blamed him for looking at other girl. I felt rlly jealous at that point of time. Now i realised, actually when we met in audition, both of us were rlly upset, we picked each other up from those sad relationship and becum couple straight away. Even b4 meeting each other. The fact is we didnt get to know each other well, learning to understand each others' character and flaws, we immediately get into relationship. That sweet feeling was no longer there. I wasnt rlly in love i guess. Thats the first mistakes i've made. Thats when everything went wrong, even how much we tried accepting each other flaws, we still quarrelled. Not bcuz we are unhappy, is bcuz of th lack of understand. My heart never beats that fast when i saw you. But after longer time, i slowly learn to accept your presence in my life. By then i understand what you demand from me. Thats my character.
To me, i wont change my character, if you like me, you've to accept me at my worst, so that i'll be at my best. Thats me, i'm such a straightforward person, who afraids to be hurt, wanting all attention just for me. I dont want my boyf to look at other girls. Thats the real lindy lai. In actual fact, i'm not a very emo person, but i tend to be sensitive and think aload. I can be friendly, i can be emo just to seek for your care and concern. Even how much i said i love you, i cant be sure how much love can i give you. I've this insecurity when i dont know you well. Thats why i'll mention breakups. Now, i cried not bcuz i love you too much, its bcuz you've brought too much memories in my life. You've given me so much things i've ever needed. Thanks to you, who have made me see this world. I cried bcuz i was used to your presence in my life, i was not used to you not being in my life. That's why i cried so much. When i started loving you, all my flaws come out, i cried bcuz we hadnt been friends to learn to know each other, i cried bcuz you cant accept my character.
When we broke up, i was holding onto the love just bcuz i hated you to be others. I detest you being with the girl. I'm so selfish. But now, i really wanna congratulate you for finding a girl you finally like. Now you've the sweetest in your heart. Thats how true love is. I truly blessed you and her. Even tho i may be jealous, but i believe, you both shud have the feelings for each other. For me, I hadnt really found someone i really like. But i wished that the person i like will like me too. The time will come i guess.
I believe what you feel for me is what i felt for you at this time. In actual fact, we arent in love. We're just in love for the matter of security for the matter of not to be lonely. I once told everyone, guys are jerks dont believe them. They take and leave. They play and go. But i didnt really mean my words bahs. People come and go, just bcuz they found someone better. Nomatter how much hurt we felt, nomatter how long the love lasted, if we dont know each other well, it's love's bad starting. I'm sorry tht i hadnt love you enuf.
I need time to settle feelings among myself. I deleted you cuz when im in love with you, your heart beats for someone else. Nomatter what, my crush for you has been gone. Even tho my heart feels pain now, it'll go away.
k-issgoodbyez
Kumi.C
I had a great talk w my pri sch childhood friends today. It feels rlly great to put down everything and have heart to heart talks! :)
Somehow, i realised the true meaning of love. In my relationships, i tend to be really sensitive, but serious. I rmbr when i first started having a crush on my 1st ex, i was rlly excited everyday i see him. Whenever we go outing, i'll have a sleepless night the night before. I was like, omg, we can be together, what can i do to make him notice me. I really was madly in love w him. Nomatter what he's my first love. We get together from friends to lovers. That's the most sweetest part. We got to know each other flaws and attitude, character etc..The sweetest feeling coming from this relationship lasted no longer than 1yearhalf. I was rlly upset due to the breakup. But everything was worthwhile.
However, now i was rlly heartbroken due to my second failed relationship. I was crying to myself everyday, why did he left me? Why? I blamed him for looking at other girl. I felt rlly jealous at that point of time. Now i realised, actually when we met in audition, both of us were rlly upset, we picked each other up from those sad relationship and becum couple straight away. Even b4 meeting each other. The fact is we didnt get to know each other well, learning to understand each others' character and flaws, we immediately get into relationship. That sweet feeling was no longer there. I wasnt rlly in love i guess. Thats the first mistakes i've made. Thats when everything went wrong, even how much we tried accepting each other flaws, we still quarrelled. Not bcuz we are unhappy, is bcuz of th lack of understand. My heart never beats that fast when i saw you. But after longer time, i slowly learn to accept your presence in my life. By then i understand what you demand from me. Thats my character.
To me, i wont change my character, if you like me, you've to accept me at my worst, so that i'll be at my best. Thats me, i'm such a straightforward person, who afraids to be hurt, wanting all attention just for me. I dont want my boyf to look at other girls. Thats the real lindy lai. In actual fact, i'm not a very emo person, but i tend to be sensitive and think aload. I can be friendly, i can be emo just to seek for your care and concern. Even how much i said i love you, i cant be sure how much love can i give you. I've this insecurity when i dont know you well. Thats why i'll mention breakups. Now, i cried not bcuz i love you too much, its bcuz you've brought too much memories in my life. You've given me so much things i've ever needed. Thanks to you, who have made me see this world. I cried bcuz i was used to your presence in my life, i was not used to you not being in my life. That's why i cried so much. When i started loving you, all my flaws come out, i cried bcuz we hadnt been friends to learn to know each other, i cried bcuz you cant accept my character.
When we broke up, i was holding onto the love just bcuz i hated you to be others. I detest you being with the girl. I'm so selfish. But now, i really wanna congratulate you for finding a girl you finally like. Now you've the sweetest in your heart. Thats how true love is. I truly blessed you and her. Even tho i may be jealous, but i believe, you both shud have the feelings for each other. For me, I hadnt really found someone i really like. But i wished that the person i like will like me too. The time will come i guess.
I believe what you feel for me is what i felt for you at this time. In actual fact, we arent in love. We're just in love for the matter of security for the matter of not to be lonely. I once told everyone, guys are jerks dont believe them. They take and leave. They play and go. But i didnt really mean my words bahs. People come and go, just bcuz they found someone better. Nomatter how much hurt we felt, nomatter how long the love lasted, if we dont know each other well, it's love's bad starting. I'm sorry tht i hadnt love you enuf.
I need time to settle feelings among myself. I deleted you cuz when im in love with you, your heart beats for someone else. Nomatter what, my crush for you has been gone. Even tho my heart feels pain now, it'll go away.
k-issgoodbyez
Kumi.C
No comments:
Post a Comment